“I believe if God has planted a dream in you, He wouldn’t want you to abandon it out of fear, lack of trying, or any other reason for that matter.” Paul Gunther Jr – Cheap Black Bracelet
I trust You, Lord.
So easy to say & yet it feels next to impossible to do sometimes. I believe with my whole heart that God knows what He is doing in my life but then some days I let that little voice in my head (okay, sometimes that voice sounds like its in panic-mode) bring me down & I start turning to every other avenue except for Jesus. Stupid me. But He’s there at every turn; taking me back in, wiping the dirt & blood from my knees & dusting off my clothes. He loves me so much. I’ve been really slacking on my Bible reading and devo time lately. I’ve been so “busy” that I just don’t set aside time to spend with the Lord. When every second of my life could be spent talking to God, living out His joy in my life…a lot of the time I just don’t do that. I go a day or two without really talking to God & even more days without listening to Him. My life would be so much happier & less confusing if I would just LISTEN to God. Those of you who know me are aware that my heart is in about 5 different areas of the world. This makes it so hard for me to choose a place to live, well, kind of. I would pick San Diego over any place, any day. But then my heart would always ache for NC, or Mexico or Jamaica & even for VA a little bit. But anyhow, I have heard God speak to me before (quite a few times) but I heard Him the loudest and clearest when I was in San Diego this past December. The message was about Impact 195, a missions school my church in San Diego is starting. I just know that this is for me. God wants me there. God will use me there (and anywhere else He places me, too). I feel like I would find purpose & more joy & rekindle my passion again. I know God is calling me to serve in the mission field to some degree. I don’t know if it’s long-term missions or short term, but I have never felt so alive as I did when I spent 10 days sleeping on a roof in Mexico (2 years in a row) & when I spent my time in Jamaica. God has given me a compassionate heart that loves others dearly, I just need to break through some barriers so I’m able to do that better. So if you’re reading this, please pray for me. Pray that I seek God’s will in my life, no matter what it takes. I want to be bold. I want to have courage. I want to be someone that brings joy & love to the lives of others. I want to be an active part of the body of Christ. Pray for me please! Oh & also, if you have anything you want me to pray for you for, let me know. Prayer is also something I want to get a lot better at. 🙂
P.S. I am definitely going to read the book that my quote came from up top. Tenley (yes, from the Bachelor. she is an amazing WOG) had it on her twitter or something & I thought it was fitting.